We have no names, man. No names! We are nameless.

We're peering under the hood of the Alpha-Alliances format with guests Cayce Grissom & Lord Bill as Meatball phones in from the galactic center.

It is an early September Saturday, sunny and mild, perfect for enjoying a bike ride, backyard barbeque… or shutting oneself indoors to play Old School Magic: the Gathering on a webcam versus twelve pals. Thusly we found ourselves, thirteen wayward mages, waylaid by the pervasive oddity that is This Year 2020, sleeving up, logging in, adjusting our lighting and grinding out games in search of the almighty doubleyou. Thanks to the organizing efforts of Lord Punts, who’s served as the lodestar by which the Lords have navigated this year's online meetups, we circled the wagons for a “family only” Gathering, our first since Lords Haus in February.

To that end, we picked up right where we left off. Maybe there was a little rust in our Orb flipping, as anecdotal evidence of more misses than usual crept into The Pit, the video chat channel used for grilling each other between rounds. Meanwhile, our “tables” for each pairing were chatrooms named after classic LOTP hotspots around the City: DMen, Maproom, Hopewell, Revolution, Bob’s Backyard, and Crown Liquors (RIP). The field offered a nice snapshot of classic archetypes and current villains: UR Burn, RUG Aggro, Monowhite, Esper Aggro, White Prison, Underworld Trix and Atogs (RUG and a White variant) among others. See our gallery below for all the technological glory.

After five rounds of Swiss + 1, it was our illustrious Meatball that proved undefeatable, sweeping the afternoon with his patented RUG Atog pile. It seems that Lord Petray, having not died a hero, has now seen himself live long enough to become the villain. His prize for successful grinding? Continued one-on-one training with the merciless Bulu Master. Luckily for R-Kid, the 90 degree temperatures seem to have abated for the season.

Can anything be taken away from this (or any) online “tournament”? The actual gameplay suffers in this environment, no doubt, and we're at the continuous mercy of our ISPs, but assembling in The Pit or catching up between rounds is the trve value of a virtual Gathering. Absences in these odd times, have indeed made hearts grow fonder, but though we may be distant, that doesn’t mean we must remain apart.

Standings (Swiss +1)

Gallery

The Kids Are Alright: The Q-Cup3 Report

It was during this, our ceaseless summer of discontent, that fifteen maniacal mages Gathered online for the latest installment of the LOTP Quarantine Cup. For our third iteration in the Q-Cup series, we consulted with assorted Deep State dossiers and Dark Web databanks to dredge up two hyper-niche formats in which to wield our aged cardboard. Batch One was Scryings, the Swedish-style Old School variant that features a 116-card “expansion” drawing from Fallen Empires through Weatherlight. Batch Two was Classic, which is essentially EC Old School + Middle School with a lengthy Restricted List. For a rundown of QC3 play, check our Pitcast episode “Sounds Like Emotional Jenga” where Final Four players, Lords Elleman, Velasco, Rohr & Baran, weave tales from their batch, semis and finals battles. Lord Ellemen continued his sizzling 2020 and can now boast back-to-back Q-Cup victories! Finally, a quick shoutout is in order to Lord Punts, our trackless Q-Cup organizer, who dominated batch play at 7-1 but was unable to complete in the Final Four.

The Lords & Co. selected The Chicago Community Bond Fund as our QC3 charity of choice with donations serving as entry fees. The CCBF pays bond for people charged with crimes in Cook County, IL. Through a revolving fund, the CCBF supports individuals whose communities cannot afford to pay the bonds themselves and who have been impacted by structural violence.

Standings (After Batches)

Scryings Gallery

Classic Gallery

We're breaking down the LOTP Q-Cup III (feat. Scryings & Classic) with its Final Four: Lords Elleman, Rohr, Velasco & Baran.

In this post-Father’s Day special episode, Lords Casleton, Sanders and Rohr open a pack of Spectral Chaos and ruminate over cards that were never meant to see the light of day.

Quarantine Cup 2: Cabin Fever gathered 21 Lords & friends to battle over the interwebs from the safety of their COVID bunkers (aka mothers' basements). Event fees were donated in support of Chicago Meals on Wheels and also served as entry for a sweet door prize. Q-Cup2 was again structured using two batches, however this time we followed with a Top 4. Following precedent from the first Q-Cup, use of proxies was permitted.

Batch 1 consisted of four matches of randomly-paired EC 93/94. Batch 2 followed with four rounds of Middle School with pairings based on records from the first batch. After the batches, the top four players revealed their deck lists and ran back their OS brews to determine the champion. The event culminated with hometown hero Lord Ellemen on an Esper-midrange deck battling southern boy Cayce Grissom on RUG Aggro. Thanks to Big Brain Bob’s technical prowess, the Lords gathered in a virtual Discord room for happy hour and live spectating. This was our virtual answer to recreating the gathering around the finals table to root for a hero of choice with friends. (Or to slander them both!) After two tight games, Lorien bested Cayce to defend the club and earn the crown.

We have lots of good-looking deck lists to check out. Lord Piquardo played a sweet mono-red Goblins deck that featured Goblin Rock Sled and Rajah broke out a slick Gauntet of Nuggetry stew. The real technology came out in the Middle School rounds, however, and undoubtedly the story of the event was Lord Etters’ insane Battle of Wits brew. After going 0-4 in OS, Tyler swept his MS opponents with his massive stack of digital cardboard. You can listen to his breakdown of the deck on the Pitcast episode “Five Alive.” (It’s totally worth grinding through Carter’s bloviating to hear it!) Lord Velasco brought a sweet take on an Esper control pile and Lord Semmens battled using a sweet Necro-Donate deck with Togs in the board. Meanwhile, Moss and I took the new MS boogeyman, Reanimator, to a combined 7-1 record. Turn one Akromas proved too much for the field to handle and I imagine an upswing in sideboard hate will follow. Moss went with Oath of Druids out of the board while I tried Show and Tell. It’s a blast to play if you like six minute matches and angry opponents.

Given the violence, worry, and uncertainty gripping the world today, the Q-Cup series has been a welcome digital Gathering to escape to connect over a children’s card game. Stay safe and take care of each other out there.

Standings (After Batches)

Old School Gallery

Middle School Gallery

We’re beating the heat by diving into the deep end of collecting artist signatures & alters with Lords Bergeson and Mith.

The Lords crack open their Memory Jars to tell tales of victories and beats from yesteryear to the current day.

Amidst life under quarantine during April, 2020, mages from across the United States of Dominaria came together for an online orgy of violence and mayhem as Mossman organized a seven-sided round robin rumble featuring Scryings. For the uninformed, Scryings includes the Swedish OS B&R list and rules (no mana burn, one Strip/Workshop, etc.) plus the 116-card “expansion” set drawing selections from Fallen Empires though Weatherlight developed by our Scandinavian Old School brethren.

While the Lords originally planned to use Scryings at the now-scuttled Relic War IV, this round robin took place under the backdrop of virulent death and economic chaos. After six weeks of strictly complying with a government stay-at-home order, I was starting to feel complacent. Where were the massive waves of illness and death that were supposed to wipe out the U.S. medical system? It didn’t happen because the scientists were right… I’ll explain what this has to do with Old School MTG below.

There is plenty of chatter about the oppressiveness of unrestricted Strip Mine in the Eternal Central format. I know because I am one of the loudest voices calling for Strip’s restriction. Repeatable, uncounterable land destruction can lead to non-games of Magic, and I’ve become complacent to the ubiquitous nature of Strips.

Now fast forward to the Seven Scrying Samurai showdown. I stared down a Reanimator stew utilizing Bazaar of Baghdad, Krovikan Horror, Ashen Ghoul, Dance of the Dead & Animate Dead, and some of the baddest fatties in Old School.  Suddenly, my complaints about Strip Mine felt quaint. Time after time, I watched Moss utilize the Bazaar/Horror engine to draw a stupid number of cards and ball me back to the stone age. I came to the realization that I had become comfortable in the uncomfortableness of playing with four Strips and when they were gone, unforeseen problems arose.

A variety of stews turned up in our event, including Monogreen Stompy, Stormbind Zoo, Disko, plus decks built around Natural Order and Empyrial Armor. I brewed up a 4C Goblins deck based around Goblin Tinkerer, Goblin Vandal and Goblin Grenade. To the surprise of exactly no one who knows me, I also included Singleton copies of Balduvian Hordes and Shivan Dragon. Cardkingdom’s mailing delays meant I was playing Goblin Balloon Brigade over Vandal, which didn’t really matter, in the scheme of things.

A handful of thoughts from the field:

1. Dwarven Miner seemed too slow. Perhaps it fits better in a slower, control shell, but jamming it into an aggro deck just slowed the tempo down when the deck needs to keep the foot on the gas.
2. Primal Order is the real deal, and almost let our Green Wizard steal a cople of matches from powered-up decks.
3. Man-o-War is an alternative answer to Reanimator instead of Tormod’s Crypt, but Bottle and Maze are still tops.
4. Mind Twist remains a hell of a card.
5. No one knows the timing interactions with Goblin Grenade. Can you cast a Goblin, hold priority, and cast Grenade, without giving someone the chance to cast Swords to Plowshares? Usually we’d just clink our beer glasses together, make a decision, and move on with our lives. In the grand scheme of things, being right doesn’t matter as much as people think it does when it comes to MTG rulings and procedures.
6. River Boa is an all-star for fair decks.
7. Wow, is Emerald Charm versatile or what? Green saw many improvements via Scryings but don’t sleep on this one-G instant.
8. Reanimator was Tier Zero when Bazaar was online. With the London Mulligan, players can mull comfortably to five to dig for a Bazaar and come out firing. Combine Bazaar with a Horror or two and card advantage racks up quickly.

I went 0-for the tournament, but had tons of fun. These types of small Gatherings are the perfect setting to try new ideas or cards you’ve never played with and see what happens. I sideboarded in a pair of Zur’s Weirdings against Papa Shane, and played one early followed by a Wheel of Fortune. Talking through all of the interactions was awesome and I learned a lot about casting that card. (I also cast it against Derek when I had three Grenades in my hand, but no goblins. Guess what I didn’t see for the rest of the game?)

Nick Viau proved to be our Shogun, besting the septet with his Disk/Egg/Troll deck. He plays different versions of this list across several formats and his passion for Disk shines through. I’m really happy for my friend picking up this victory. Each participant got a Fourth Edition Triskelion with a Samurai mask inked on it. Thanks to all the other Samurai for enjoying this game that we love together. I can’t say enough good things about the #MTGUnderground, so I’ll end with a request for everyone: wash your hands, stay home, and keep casting Mind Twist on Turn One.

Decklist Gallery